November 10, 2010
I’ve been trying to write this post all day. It’s 10:30 PM and I’m finally off my feet. I haven’t written a Twinspin in months. I’d really like to create an online community of twin parents who can support each other by posting questions, giving answers, and sharing their own spin on life with twins. A Twinspin every other week – as posts come in, or I feel the itch to write about it.
But I need to know…
If you’re a twin parent, do you find Twinspins helpful, enjoyable, worth continuing?
If you’re not a twin parent, please chime in. Are these kind of posts of interest to you… or not? (I have thick skin.)
Several twin moms are waiting in the wings to blog about their experience. And some of them have excellent questions to pose. But I’d hate for their questions to evaporate into the big black hole of the blog world – only to bounce lonely through the void of “no comments.”
So I need some feedback…
Thumbs-up on Twinspins? Or bag it?
Reality Check
As for the post I’ve been trying to write today, it was going to be about comfort. Finding comfort for your little ones when you don’t have enough arms to do the holding.
Just before bathtime I herded all the kids onto the couch with their mamies (favorite blankets) for a picture. (Etymology of “mamie” forthcoming.) The photo-op lasted a whole three seconds, then quickly unravelled into this.
And this.
More contention than comfort. And my brain is so fried tonight, all I can write about is how we just kind of made it through the day.
I invited my sister Rachel over for dinner so we could celebrate her birthday. My parents came too. It was one of those things I wanted to do. I love Rachel and the girls had a blast setting the table for her big meal and making their own “cupcakes” for her.
Their version of a “cupcake” consisted of sprinkles and red-hots on top of a twix bar drizzled with food coloring, all contained (thank goodness) within the confines of a cupcake liner. Man. Those were some interesting cupcakes!
Unfortunately, it was so chaotic I didn’t even think about pulling out the camera. We had a fun night (Happy Birthday Rachel! xo). But I knew exactly what I had signed up for. Our guests had commitments right after dinner and Doug was gone so dish duty was going to be big.
By 9:30, with baths done and all little ones finally asleep, I strolled into the kitchen to survey the damage.
Here’s some of the counter decor. I wasn’t brave enough to take pictures of the food on the carpet, the stack of pots and pans and the range, or the double high chair devastation.
But this gives you a pretty good idea.
I walked in a circle for about thirty seconds shifting plates from one counter to the other (accomplishing absolutely nothing) trying to figure out where to start.
Sidenote: See our lovely wallpaper in the background? Half the kitchen looks like this.
While the other half looks like this. One step closer to paint! The peeling project is in full swing thanks to Doug’s parents. Indentured servitude seems like inadequate payment for their hours of help.
After vacuuming up the last clump of rice and parking the Hoover in the pantry, I sat down and ate one of these.
No I did not bake them. And no, I did not feel the least bit guilty that it was my second “real” cupcake of the evening. In a warped kind of emotional-eating sense, I felt I deserved it. Every moist bite of coconutty goodness.
So I guess that’s my spin on life with twins tonight. Some days are more about survival than culling meaning out of all the moments. And that’s okay.
Please comment so I can determine the future of Twinspins. I’d like to get a pulse on readership. You can peruse earlier Twinspins here.
Much obliged!
cristie
you are definitely in the thick of thick things. i'm happy for you. xox
Angela
Yes you deserved that cupcake.
I found your blog when right about the time my twins were learning to eat, and it was your post about one spoon or two that convinced me I wasn't crazy for using one spoon. I like hearing your experiences with twins.
Shells
I for one like reading the Twinspins since my dad is one and it makes me think of him and my Gradma, but I don't often comment since I am not a twin mom myself.
Go ahead and eat another cupcake if you want, I won't tell anyone!
Jen
I LOVE the twin spins! I could laugh and cry at your photos. The day I got a picture of all 4 of my kids smiling and looking at the camera was glorious to behold!
Camille
Your twinspins are an inspiration to me and I hope you continue them. I have 1-1/2 yr old twin girls & we're about ready to start IVF for a 2nd time. I found your blog when I was feeling overwhelmed and these twinspins brought me the comfort and eternal perspective I need. Thanks!
Ps- I don't comment on blogs very often (a little quirk of mine.)
catharvy
Cristie – so thick some days! 🙂
Angela – Loved seeing the pics of your boys. You have a very unique story -adopting newborn twins. If you'd be willing to share it here, please drop me a line! Thanks for your comment. It means a lot to know a twinspin helped even one person! Thank you!
Michelle – I do recall your Dad is a twin – you've mentioned it before I think. Fascinating isn't it, to think what motherhood might have been like for those women who went before us. Thanks so much for reading.
Jen – I could laugh and cry too. Yes – getting everyone in front of the camera is a monumental triumph isn't it?
Camille – thanks so much for leaving your comment. Love your quirk of not commenting very often – it's probably liberating in a way! But it makes your comment here all the more meaningful. Thank you so much. I'm realizing it's a huge help to know the idea of connecting and encouraging each other here is worth pursuing. I wish you the very best as you begin IVF again. It's a tough road – both emotionally and physically. You're awesome for doing it again. Blessings!
EKW
I just stumbled on your blog recently. I also have two sets of twins, although they are both fraternal. I know I would enjoy reading Twinspins!
Brodi Ashton
What a day, Cath! I wish you'd just call me when that happens, because I could come over and help you clean and we could catch up!
And I love the Twinspins too, even though I don't have twins.
Cari
My friend (and yours!) Leigh told me about your blog. Since I don't know you I just lurk and have never commented but I'll start if you don't stop your twinspins! I have 7 month old boy/girl twins and have laughed and cried at the majority of your posts at 2, 3, 4 and 5 am. Yep, I went back and read your blog from the beginning. So thanks for giving me some excellent reading material because my twins weren't and still aren't that great of sleepers. I love your honest reflections on life. Thanks for letting me lurk!
Tricia
I have 5 children, including 2 year old twin girls. My oldest was 6 when they were born, so I know the life of having 5 little dependants all at once. I just found your blog a few days ago. Tuesday Twinspin sounds interesting– as long as it's not just "one more thing" on top of everything else for you!!
catharvy
EKW – Two sets! Awesome. How old are your twins (what do we call double twins by the way – twinsies?)
Brod – Okay. I AM going to call you! I think chatting with you could do me some sanity (whether we did dishes or not!)
Cari – I am SO glad you commented. I'm sure you feel the same way – but I ADORE Leigh and her family. I loved your "threat" about discontinuing twinspins. Actually, after reading these last few comments (from people I had no idea were reading), I feel like crying. Maybe it's the kinship I feel in doing something so challenging as twins. Maybe it's the reality that something I'm writing might actually be of worth. I'm grateful you said something. I hope you won't be a stranger. And I know those nights all too well, of being up in the wee hours of the morning. Hang in there!
Tricia – are you in Virginia? I cruised through your pictures and loved seeing your "kidlets." Beautiful family. You know the intensity of this time – to be sure! You bring up a good point. I have considered the reality that this might be "one more thing" but I feel strongly about it. And if other twin parents are willing to contribute a post now and then, I think it's worth doing. So glad to have you along!
Mary
I love reading Twinspins!! I am pretty sure it's preparing me for when I have ONE child since I already know I can't handle two. 🙂 I also pretty much love reading about your sweet family. 🙂
EKW
The oldest set is six, a three year old singleton and then a three month old set. All 5 boys! I am starting to come out of the newborn fog a little. The second set was born at 36 weeks so it was much less stressful. They were able to leave the hospital with us. The older boys were born at 32 weeks. Not sure I could have handled that twice! I am enjoying reading your posts. I can definitely relate! (btw, my hubby is a CPA too)
Meagen
Yes, yes…thumbs up on twinspins. I look forward to all of your posts. You help me smile about the crazy times around here (namely, the hours of (3-6-ish p.m.) and appreciate what I've got rather than simply be swallowed up by it. Thank you for all of your posts-especially for the twinspins.
Emily S.
I love twin spins! Keep it up and I will comment more often. I need the advice, comments and place to vent! Love you Cath and all you do! Taylor left today and I have eaten one cupcake and 4 pumpkin choc/chip muffins!
Melissa Black
As I said in my email, I think that twinspins are a great idea. It is so nice to have questions answered and I enjoy reading about experiences that I can relate to. I would love to share an experience some time and I would be happy to pose some of my seemingly endless questions to other twin moms. I have a few local twin mom friends and their advice has been invaluable. I love the idea of expanding my twin mom network.
Stephie
The "Twinspins" are some of my favorite posts! Don't stop! I love your realism and humor. I had to laugh at your "comfort photos"–we have lots of pictures like that. Your always lucky to get that one "happy shot" before things go south!
And I agree with your other blogger friends, you totally deserved that cupcake–or maybe two or three! Some days just merit more sugar than others!
catharvy
Mary – I can't think of anyone better suited for twins! You've had great practice!!
EKW – Geesh! Your hubby is a CPA too!? Uncanny. We should meet to commiserate. Tax Widows Anonymous. That lot in life needs a support group of its own. (I am grateful though that Doug is gainfully employed – despite the hours.) Both our sets of twins were born at 32 weeks. You must have been so relieved to make it 36! Hurrah for you.
Meagen – I'd really like for you to write a Twinspin sometime. Would you think about it and email me if you have a topic you'd like to write about?
Em – Okay. How long is Taylor gone? Can I bring dinner some day next week? PLEASE!! I'll replenish your pumpkin cookie stash.
Melissa – I agree. Advice from people who know is priceless. It's great to expand our network of resources.
Steph – "some days just merit more sugar than others" – thank you. That sounds like scripture to me.
Mary
haha . . . funny funny Catherine. If I have twins they can live at your house….:)
Rachel
That was actually really comforting to hear you say: That some days are more about survival than culling the meaning out of the moments. (Or more about survival than setting grand plans for my future, or grand plans for anything more than 1/2 into the future.)
I found your blog via Sarah of Clover Lane & love it! I have 4 little girls, 7 and under, which seems luxurious now in a way. 😉 Yet I know all moms, no matter where our kids are placed and spaced, have those hanging by the fingernail days. Sometimes more often than others. Hang in there! Your children are darling; what a gift.
Sarah@AlpinePoppy
I like reading the twin spins, but I don't officially have twins, do Irish twins count?
Any way, I simply enjoy reading your blog, whatever you want to write about is great with me 🙂
Sarah@AlpinePoppy
Some days just require more sugar~. My new favorite quote 🙂
Sarah
Just happened upon your blog and ever so thankful that I did! I am a mother of three beautful girls under the age of three, and can often relate to your posts. Please, simply do what you feel you can do…but know that I will happily read and enjoy all that you post. God Bless you and your beautiful family!
LizzyP
Thumbs up for twinspins from me!
Cecilia
I just found your blog and love reading about twins!
I am praying for a fertility surge as I get near menopause. Two sets of twins would bring my child count to 7 and I think that would be the coolest thing in the world. Am I crazy?
catharvy
Mary – right. stay at my house. Are you volunteering to come too?
Rachel – I labored over that line, and wondered if I should delete it. But then I thought, that's exactly how I feel today. No energy to even contemplate the meaning. It was just a day. So thanks for your comment. You understand well the squishing of children, the intensity of this time. Thanks so much for reading.
Sarah (Alpine Poppy) – Yes! Irish twins most definitely count. Close enough to the real thing for sure!
Sarah – Three in three years. Well, you get it! Thanks for your encouragement. We all just do what we can do right? And we should be okay feeling that is enough.
Liz – I'll keep doing Twinspins, if you'll contribute a post some time. Yes? Email me if you have a topic (or question) you'd like to write about.
catharvy
Cecelia – I love your enthusiasm! No you're not crazy. But maybe you should come live with me for a few weeks just to make sure! 🙂 So loved your comment. Glad to have you along!
Natty
Please continue! I am Mike & Jill's neighbor. They told me about your story and blog. You give me hope that I'll survive. My twin boys are 5 months old and have a very busy 2 year old brother! I get so overwhelmed sometimes and a network of people going through the same thing sounds refreshing! Any survival tips are welcome! Thanks. Your kiddos are beautiful! Natalie
catharvy
Natalie – Jill has told me about you (more than once!) I can't believe your boys are five months! She's always so impressed with how together you are. It's wonderful to connect. I think we're going to keep the Twinspins going. I'm feeling such encouragement just knowing all of you are out there! Thank you!
Meagen
I'd be happy to write a twinspin! I'll be thinking about it and email you when I have an idea worth sharing. Thanks,
Mrs. Pauls
Hello! I just found your blog today. We have 11 month old identical twin girls and are loving every minute! (Ok – almost every minute)
I won't have time to read many twinspins today, but I did take a quick look at the 'one spoon or two' post. I am a one spoon mum. I've seen them suck on each others fingers, so I know those germs are shared no matter how careful I am!
I look forward to reading more!
p.s. Lucky you for having 2 sets of twins! We'd love to have twins again in the future.
catharvy
Mrs. Pauls – You too confirm the theory. Always one spoon. Love the sucking on each other's fingers. Now that my boys are toddling, I see them swapping binkies often. Such is life! So glad to have you reading. If you have a question to pose, a thought to add, don't hesitate to email! You positive attitude shines through your comment. I do feel lucky.
Sarah
I would read ANYTHING you write!!! 🙂
Lynn
A friend sent me your blog and the info on your twinspins posts. Seems like a great idea to me! It's really helpful to chat/post with other twin parents and get new ideas, or just realize that what we're going through is normal. We have five month old boy/girl twins, and I look forward to keeping up with your blog.